Taiwan - Finally!

When Rachelle and Brittany, two friends from my hometown, returned from a two-week trip to China this summer, I asked them to give me the low-down on Asia. Out of the many tidbits they shared, the point they emphasized the most was that generally, bathroom facilities are not equipped with toilets. Instead, they use “squatty-potties,” which are basically porcelain-coated holes in the ground into which you relieve yourself. At first, I assumed they were exaggerating. Or, at the very least, this couldn’t be an Asia-wide standard. After all, Josh had been living in Taiwan for six weeks, and surely would have thought to mention such a…umm…cultural difference.

They were not exaggerating. And Taiwanese bathrooms absolutely include squatty-potties.

I first experienced these in the Tokyo airport bathrooms during my layover. The stalls were labeled “American Style” and “Japanese Style,” which instantly raised a red flag. Feeling a little panicky, I nudged open a “Japanese Style” stall…and proceeded to stand awkwardly in the doorway, my mouth gaping open at the rounded-rectangle of porcelain set into the floor. Why had Josh not warned me of this?! I could have spent part of the summer practicing, you know, doing squats and lunges and stuff. This isn’t a huge deal (I tried to reason with myself), but it does affect an activity I do multiple times a day, not to mention a significant muscle group. Surely he would have also found this a bit unusual and made some sort of comment. I mean, good Lord, Rachelle and Brittany couldn’t stop talking about it.

Then I remembered: he’s a man. I’m not passing judgment; it’s just that peeing on the ground makes things more convenient, and actually, the porcelain is an added luxury.

Although, when I asked Josh why he didn’t mention it (Yes, I asked. Quite indignantly, in fact.), he made an excellent point: it’s pretty gross to sit on a toilet, seeing as God knows how many people’s butts have been planted in that exact spot.

So yeah. I just dedicated a substantial part of my first blog post about Taiwan to the particulars of using the toilet. I can sense my mother’s horror from here.

Despite the squatty-potty issue (Which, by the way, is a horrible term, obviously created by some vulgar American.), Taiwan has been an amazing experience thus far. The Taiwanese are uber friendly, and there is so much to do and see – dazzling temples, beautiful jungle hikes, lively night markets… Plus eating has become my new favorite hobby. Dumplings are the bomb, shaved ice/fruit desserts are delish AND hydrating, and bubble milk tea is literally manna from heaven. Seriously, I wouldn’t be surprised if researchers someday discover that “milk and honey” stuff the Israelites were raving about was really milk tea.

Also, I discovered a website that streams 30 Rock for free in Taiwan, so basically I’m all set on American TV. Tina Fey is just funny – it doesn’t matter where you are.